Love is blind so they say, but what does this mean? That you can fall in love with someone without seeing their appearance? Without the social status, bank account or business achievements? That you only connect at soul level. But is that enough?
In the Netflix series “Love is blind”, singles enter the experiment by dating blind. They meet in different rooms separated by a thin wall, so-called 'pods'. They can't see each other, but they can hear each other. All women date all men and over time you pick your favourite. If it's mutual, you go on dating. If there really is a connection and they want to move further, he asks her to marry him. Only when she says yes they get to see each other for the first time. Great TV if you ask me! The relief or disappointment when you see your fiancé for the first time. Finally hugging that person with whom you have had such intimate conversations and for whom you think you have feelings, it is wonderful! Or it's so painful that even a date at the First Dates restaurant seems relaxed.
Why get engaged without seeing each other?
In the safety of the pods they dare to be vulnerable to each other, they tell each other things they have never shared with others before. There is crying, laughing and flirting. "What are you wearing?" He asks. She tells about her outfit in detail. A groan of approval comes from the other room. Challenge and enthuse each other without ever having seen each other and without touching each other, it is possible. The couples feel loved and in love. The 'I love you's' are exchanged as well as promises about forever and ever. They are overwhelmed and blind with love. So is love blind after all?
Where does it go wrong?
Unfortunately, not all couples make it to the altar and of the couples who say 'I do', only a few stay really married. Why does the feeling fade? Is appearance that important? No. Even after the unveiling, most couples remain in love. External features that previously stood in the way no longer count. The opinion of the social environment such as family and friends also influences but is not decisive in the decision. The bummer of love is ratio. When the head takes over from the heart. That happens when the couples return to normal life. They go back to work, see their friends and family again, and pick up their hobbies. And then it happens. You can almost see the rader get into motion in their heads. They realize that their lives are different. There is a difference in life stage, in finances, in faith, in social activities, etc. And then the harsh reality sets in and they realize:
“When I make a connection, I have to give up things.” And maybe this one is even scarier: “If I make this connection, I become vulnerable.” Love is blind or can blind you, I do believe that. A much more interesting question is: when is love enough? When is it enough to give up and risk it? Do you dare?
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